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ThoseArentMuskets
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Tech Support Computers are the future, and the future is now. *** HD version's audio is out of sync. Don't bother :( *** those aren't muskets phone line help service tech support spoof sketch prank rape me nirvana comedy |
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The Institute for Pornographic Nomenclature Cliff Crabbe faces new challenges as they arise. those aren't arent muskets sketch comedy spoof funny porn pornography indiana jones star wars movies names |
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Internet Time Traveler Strange doings at the birth of the Information Superhighway. those aren't arent muskets internet time travel traveler funny sketch comedy two girls one cup star wars kid |
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Damn You, Batman Commissioner Gordon has some harsh words for The Batman. those aren't arent muskets spoof sketch batman dark knight christian bale gary oldman gordon gotham |
Uploader: ThoseArentMuskets |
Internet Intervention Myspace finally gives up on the Internet. FOR THE RECORD: Yes, this video was released on Cracked.com a while back. But we finally got the rights to post it ourselves, and we like having all our vids on our Youtube channel. This one also has some minor added content...see if you can spot it! those aren't arent muskets sketch comedy funny myspace facebook digg cracked ebay tubgirl 4chan intervention internet |
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Oreo Moments-After School A finalist in the Oreo Moments Contest. A young man ponders the availability of oreos in his life. To vote for this video in the Oreo Moments Contest, visit http://www.youtube.com/oreo Then find our video in the randomizer and give it a thumbs up! those aren't muskets oreo moments |
Uploader: ThoseArentMuskets |
Forbidden Bong Rip Oh, what a difference a sound effect makes! those aren't arent muskets forbidden kingdom jet li jackie chan redub marijuana drugs bong rip |
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Star Trek Rap (feat. Prime Directive and Galaxy Class) Resistance is futile. All beats will be assimilated. [Warning: lyrics NSFW] .mp3: http://thosearentmuskets.blogspot.com/2008/06/space-tunes-ready-for-some-serious.html ----- "THE U.S.S. ENTERPRISE (IS GETTING P.U.S.S.Y. TONIGHT)" SPOKEN: Yo yo yo, this the Prime Directive. Rule number one: you can't break me. Galaxy Class over here, 'cause I'm top of the line. CHORUS: The U.S.S. Enterprise Is getting P.U.S.S.Y. tonight So shake that ass, 'cause fornication Is the only way to make The Next Generation P.D.: Let me introduce you to my crew The horny-ass men and women of the U. S.S.E.N.T.E.R.-prise On a continuing mission to spread them thighs There's Geordi Laforge with his prying eyes Getting X-ray shots of your naughty side Down below he's growing twice the size Because the ladies make his warp drive energize And as for Q he'll make you cum So loud you'll wake the whole continuum But girl you know when he's done getting with you He's going to bounce like Doctor Crusher in season two G.C.: I said Enter-P.R.I.S.E. Let me tell you about my boy, his name's Wesley Going to be in Starfleet Academy But tonight he's getting crunk with yours truly So we bust on down to the Forward Ten Wes knows the bouncer and we get right in We're knocking back shots of Cardassian gin When up comes a fine-ass Romulan When it comes to booty-shaking, girl's got a gift 'Cause she raised that ass like a turbolift But yo, we ditched her face down in the mud Because Wesley had his eyes on Ashley Judd P.D.: Me? I wound up on the holodeck She's got a virtual booty that I'm ready to wreck ("Enter when ready") Her program always does the trick You know I leave the holodeck with a hollow dick Yeah she sucks on my nuts till the whole thing's empty Then I go cruising in a 64 Bently CHORUS G.C.: Whorf used to be on the block selling rock Now while you're in your stateroom jerking in a sock He's got that Ferengi pussy on lock Yeah he's balls deep and he's yelling "Kaplach!" P.D.: He used to have trouble picking up bitches Till he learned they love them forehead ridges Now whenever he wants to cream He just pulls in pussy like a tractor beam G.C.: Yo but don't forget about Counselor Troy That Betazoid will leave your dick destroyed And don't you bother screaming or squealing 'Cause she knows exactly how you're feeling P.D.: Data's the android Who'll fill your void He's a mechanical man with a robot cock Knock on your G-spot like he was Sherlock, Holmes G.C.: Ain't nothing like him in space or on Earth Got a digital dick of alarming girth He's the only man to please Tasha Yar's poon My boy Data, son of Soong Tasha died but he don't sweat lost tooshie He just replaced her with another fine pussy BREAKDOWN: Who's going to rock a robotic cock? Data's going to rock a robotic cock I said who's going to rock that hydraulic cock? Data's going to rock a hydraulic cock 'Cause he can time his nuts like a digital clock "I am fully functional" Now open wide shorty and hold real still My phaser's 'bout to fire and it's set to kill CHORUS P.D.: Captain Picard Loves to get his dick hard His bald head will make you sweat 'Cause he's a French motherfucker with a tasty baguette And when he's not sipping tea at a Parisian café He's busy banging booty every night and all day ("Proceed") But homie don't play, he don't want no snog Girl you got a stardate with the captain's log ("Engage") G.C.: Now Picard's a man whose dick is large But when he's not on the bridge then Riker's in charge He's the playa of the minute and I'll tell you son When it comes to busting pussy Riker's "number one" P.D.: And if you shake your rear quarters especially fine He just might make you hit warp 69 But if Jean-Luc busts in don't you fear He's only here to take you past the final frontier G.C.: Now that's a double team of the highest order Bubble booty bouncing in the captain's quarters They got a young Romulan dripping buckets When she sees their junk she says "those aren't muskets!" Riker pulls out and says he's ready to blow Like a pimp Picard says "ma-ma-make it so" Then J.L.P.'s out, he's got shit to do Peeping the ruins on Calder II BOTH: And that's how it rolls under J.L.P. The Crushers, Beverly and Wesley Whorf and Riker and my man Geordi Q, Data, Troy and yeah, Whoopi And the Enterprise D And for three films E Welcome to the motherfucking T.N.G. CHORUS star trek rap those aren't arent muskets wars next generation picard kirk troy geordi whoopi goldberg wheaton data |
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Games Conference The greatest minds of the late 70's determine our children's futures. those aren't muskets videogame game 1970 70s acid sketch |
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CHOPS: The Trailer (Sketchies 2 Finalist) http://www.thosearentmuskets.com Sometimes you just have to grow them out. SPECIAL THANKS: This was the most complex project we've ever put together, and we couldn't have done it without the talents and time of a number of very generous people. We'd like to thank them for their hard work. If you laugh at this, it's because of them. CAST AND CREW: CHOPS...David Swaim FRIEND...Lara Pickle RUSSIAN...Brian Kelly THUGS...Brett Rader, Ryan Rickets, and Dan Rubiano VILLAIN...Michael Swaim MOM...Heather Pauley AGENT 1...Nathan Turner TED...Matt Barrs SHEENA...Brittany Candau AGENT 2...Baily Hopkins DAUGHTERS...Ariana and Aneissa TORTURER...Dan Shapiro AGENT 3...Spencer Howard DAD...Dylan Seaton TEAM LEADER...Abe Epperson COOL GUY...Jonathan Hicken KEY GRIP/BEST BOY/HELPER...James Bak GUY WITH GUNS...Nathan Turner FIGHT CHOREOGRAPHER...Cheetah Platt LOCATION HELP...Ryan Severance, Dylan Seaton, Matt Barrs, John Hicken EXTRAS COORDINATOR...Ryan T. Ricketts All music by Abe Epperson. http://thosearentmuskets.com those aren't muskets chops action movie spoof trailer sketch |
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An Ode for Brian Kelly Well, here we are. We've all been waiting for the perfect moment for some time now. You have given us so much: laughter, sadness, and the will to look into our own souls and see the truth. You remind us of ourselves and that we can strive to be better. No, the best. So here's us giving back to you... PS. BK is not dead. He's just being remembered. those aren't muskets brian kelly awesome |
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Emo Song If you don't watch this video, we will cut ourselves. audio: http://thosearentmuskets.blogspot.com/2008/03/cheer-up-musket-kids.html Lyrics: Last night, I had the saddest dream You said that we weren't meant to be I woke up alone, and I knew it was true I'm calling to tell you what you made me do I had to cut myself To make the pain leave And I'll do it again Unless you go out with me Cut myself Baby Six months later, and we're still together But I can't help thinking things used to be better I remember all those afternoons when you dried my tears Before you said you were dating me just because of your fears That I would cut myself But seriously I'm going to cut myself Unless you say you love me Cut myself Cut myself Feel guilty Now we watch TV and you snuggle in my hoody Suddenly I realize I've sprung a monster woody I know that you're tired from cooking my spaghetti But if I don't get release soon I just might be ready To cut myself I'll do it again I'm going to bleed on your shit Unless you make like the wind And blow me Oh, I don't want to cut myself but you make me sad You should know that when I cut myself it hurts really bad Just like it hurts when I don't get me nachos Go get me some nachos Or I'll cut myself Cut myself Cut myself Because that's how I roll As long as I've got blood and angst I've got full control I mean it this time, the razor's right here Although I may feel better if I get a cold beer Who knows? Those aren't arent muskets emo song music video I'll cut myself spoof parody funny sketch |
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Kid's a Champ Jeremy expresses himself creatively. Co-written with Wayne Gladstone. those arent muskets kids champ valentines day parent teacher conference sketch comedy wayne gladstone |
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A Sketchies II Finalist! The Hot Farts! The results of this band meeting could very well change the face of rock forever. Vote for us in the Sketchies II ( http://www.youtube.com/user/Sketchies2 ) competition (VOTING STARTS MARCH 12) and help us win production equipment and 25K!! those arent aren't muskets sketch comedy band music hot farts |
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Internet Party The only house party being described as a series of tubes! Those aren't arent muskets sketch spoof internet party facebook myspace ebay paypal youtube |
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Canada thinks we're crazy We answered some questions for G4TechTV Canada that will air on the show Torrent. Hello, Canada! those arent muskets g4 tech torrent canada space abe michael |
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G4 Torrent Throw Once again, for Canadian eyes only. those arent muskets g4 tech torrent canada space abe michael |
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G4 has good taste We got mentioned on "Attack of the Show" on G4. Yay internet! those arent muskets g4 clitter ego |
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Koko the Gorilla You know, gorillas are smarter than dolphins. those aren't arent muskets koko gorilla san francisco zoo sign language sketch spoof |
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Clitter! It's glitter! For your vagina! those aren't arent muskets sketch comedy funny spoof ad infomercial clitter glitter vagina sex |
